nothing more that i can deliver .

-
as long as you don`t 'kill' yourself.

i`m hoping for a realisation, not for me.
-

the break of dawn .

-
starting to get really nocturnal these days.
i wish i could be at the beach right now, to see the sunrise.
sometimes we`re so occupied with work,
we missed out the beautiful things in life.

i want to talk. just talk.
under the blue sky.
under the starry sky.

be better than me.
-

oh well ...

-
i know. i knew.
~hush~
-

MMI

-
journey to the west tomorrow.
early. in. the. morning.
-

straight through my heart .

-
so whats the meaning of this ?

i may never know the answer to this endless mystery.
-

a peep back .

-
read some random posts in the past.
my way of writing changed.
okay wait.
its my way of TYPING changed.
ouh yeah.
hell wait.
its my way of THINKING.
=.="

and so... well well...
some post totally kiddish.
some post freakin hilarious.
some post full of anger.
some post for friends.
some post no link to life.

its kinda interesting to read back your damn past entries.
i could say i did laughed through.
some intense ones still did leave some silence. O.O

imagine if our lives were to be recorded in video form,
and when you`re old, play it back.
aww...
its gonna be damn intense... damn emotional... ><

alright fullstop.
shall go bathe.
mum`s siren @.@
-

the sun rises in the east .

-
stories may get twisted along the way :)

i see where i`m heading to.

hooked on bad romance, its the damn tune!
-

the weather is sad .

-
sketches at 12%. and im just like forcing out ideas?

by the way, missed the meteor showers that day. (there were 14!)

ack.

UIA UIA UIA:

the studio is empty now.
Cheng is blasting his music from his iphone.
i am finding the name of a Norwegian designer to do the designer review.
Chee Koon just came back to find if there's any doughnut left.
("eh where`s my doughnut!?")
Lin Wei brought his son in! No wonder can hear some kid's voice.
I`m lazy to go over and take a look at him.
Mei Sin is preaching on something to a bunch of people.
i just realised its quite cold and the air con isnt even on. (i thought i could off it =.=")
& my stomach is grumbling. ><
and oh! Lin Wei carried his child over here, to check on us.
told me he gonna return my R&A tmrw.
Fat just sat down to check out the songs in Cheng's ipod.
O.O my media player is playing that song.
Ken is looking over us from above... (the 6th floor corridor, not heaven yea.)
omg. while i just finish typing the previous sentence, he was already in the studio!
the 3 year old boy was happy.
Chee Koon patted his head. LOL!

~

alright back to hunting of Norwegian Designer's names!
ahh... nature`s call.
gotta answer it first.

to end it off,
THE BIRTHDAY MAN IS PLAYING WITH THE LITTLE BOY!
HAHAHAHA!

what a sight...
-

thread a new path .

-
because everyone is afraid to step out of their comfort zone.
i wish i COULD.
-

SHUT! UP !

-
and people can still complain about their lives...
i shall not go on further.
-

rendezvous .

-
the GODS meeting.

i can`t wait. :)
-
-

feeling it .

-
-
-paying the price...

thanks, yet again.

-
just how grateful.
just how forgiving.

just as it is,
the stars are hidden on a rainy night.

i should stop opening up stitched wounds.
i should let them heal.
and never tear it open again.

the only way to prove this...
time will tell. (:

this night i took a step to define myself.

recall ...

-
there is alot...
to ask.
to say.
to remember.
to forget.
to rejoice.
to regret.

SAAAMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

& i know you`ve gotten sick of me, Adik.
i`ve been terrible to youuu...
i hurt myself for hurting you...
yet the pain you suffer is greater than mine.
i need to fix myself...
fast.
real fast.

help.

outside the green zone .

-
"When people get hurt, they learn to hate. When people hurt others they become hated.

But knowing that pain allows people to be kind, pain allows them to grow, and how you grow is up to you.

You know pain, you think about it, you learn to live with it,
but when pain becomes attach with revenge and anger, pain becomes aweful and strong,

it makes you blind."

Pain (Nagato) from the series Naruto Shippuden.

Pain is proof you are living, it means you are not dead yet.
It means there is hope.

i have washed it away :)

-
for those who didnt realise,
my blog's past background were black for a reason.

now you can see what you might have missed.

i realise the screaming pain .

-
-
-
maybe i shouldnt even bother talking about it.

suppressing what should not be .

-
-
-
-
-
the stars are hidden on a rainy night.
-
-
-
-
-

disgusted .

-
what happened to me?

i only kept hurting. :(
epecially you, Adik.
i didnt knew those 3 months of SIP would leave a grudge this deep in me.
never have i felt so much hatred.

and for being selfish, i cause pain to others.
Adik, i deeply regret if i hurt you in any way.
need to get rid of this black stain on my heart.

its the end of the line aint it ?

-
I failed, I lost it.

and i thought i can understand. but i just dont. all that i have brought... is just pain pain pain... i dont know what im doing. my purpose in life? gone. i wish i can go far away now. i dont wish to remember nor remembered. i need some time.

my heart is dying.
i need a transplant.