i was about to claim that i`m feeling rather down & sad.
ABOUT TO, but not yet.
i feel that i should be happy for my well being now.
thinking of those people less fortunate and capable than me,
i believe that i should not be sad.
instead i should be greatful to God to let me live this life.
well i can EVER say i`m not sad or even pretend i`m fine.
but whats the point to it when deep down my heart keeps getting scarred?
maybe because i keep the feelings to myself too much?
too much that i took the brunt of pain in exchange to keep someone else happy?
damn why is this happening?
zzz.
i was once PRAISED for being strong to get through tough times.
heh, being strong eh?
when in actuality i`m suffering deep inside.
now let me say this.
those who pretends to be strong on the outside when the inside is crumbling,
is in fact the most weak, and fragile.
now well, i learnt my lesson didn`t i?
no, i`m still figuring out why.
i still lack resolve.
maybe, just maybe,
i am afraid to deliver it.
because the last time i did that.
i not only scarred my own heart,
but another`s too.
most people wants to be the sun that brightens up your day,
but i`d rather be the moon that shines down on you in your darkest hour.
black will paint over white,
& red will stain it.
` samarra .
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