how do i stand up to this?

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those words affect me. they are true.
but i really very much do not want to judge my friends that way.
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why does my heart, feel so bad...

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if everyday is like this then i`d prefer staying out .

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if there`s such a thing when you could give your life to revive a dead, i wont hesitate.
i`ll freaking remove myself & revive my grandfather.

so my mum would stop nagging at me.
& hopefully my grandfather could bring all of our families back together.
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that girl.

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recall-ed.

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i want to stay honest to how i feel now.
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my immortal .

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your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
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not easy, but not difficult either...

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it was never easy, never.
i did what i could to stay in line.

try putting yourself in the other`s person shoes
& feel what the person is feeling.

in anycase, i`m grateful, i appreciated.
considering whether i should tear down this place.
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another of my reality .

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too deep now to ever swim against the current.
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hi.

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suffering, isn`t a bad idea.
it peels my eyes.
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'it' looks like me.

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that ghost of me was standing outside my mum`s bedroom.
it didnt respond to my mum.

next time i`ll wash my face and feet first when i got home.
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everything for that piece of paper.

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congratulations to Muhammad Samir Bin Fadali.

i`ve graduated. PID. TP. 2010.
thanks to my family & friends who have helped me through this past 3 years.
forgive me i`ve ever been a letdown to you people.
i can write tons of things, but i prefer this would be enough.

& i thought i could settle it. i could not.
the fact of it dawned on me just now on my way home.
as much as i want to forget it, i also still want to remember it.
for it was a beautiful disaster i ever created.

i could just kill myself smiling.



tomorrow, the sun will rise.
tomorrow, is a new day.
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one of my favourite scene! :D

SHREK-ed with a bunch. :)
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the chords will continue.

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the last serenade, no.
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she`s so sweet with her get back stare .

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AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH THISS SONNNGGGGG ROCKKKKKKKS! :D
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... or random circumstance.

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it was when our emotions clash,
that i can feel that i`m alive.

do our hearts need to scar,
for us to have each other in mind.

at the most stupid things.
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& I fell apart, but got back up again

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No warning sign, no alibi
We faded faster than the speed of light
Took our chance, crashed and burned
No we'll never ever learn
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stop being so ego & thinking you`re damn right all the time.

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what would you do when you did your best to help your friend,
and they ignore you?

friends give advices that is best for their friends.
most of times, the advices are bitter and hard to accept.

but if you remain stubborn,
then what can i do?

i would just be adding oil to the fire right?
so i would just watch you destroy yourself?

never, not in my lifetime.
i`m just stubborn too, to let you go & drown in your problems.
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life is like a box of chocolates... RUN FORREST RUN!

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the other day i finally felt that i`ve grown old.
(we all are aging every moment anyway)
looking at all the youngsters having fun time.
it wasn`t so bad. i had a great life so far.

just hoping it gets better.
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money & all the stuck up things that goes with it.

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funny.
funny how we, in this modern world, are craving for things that aren`t important at all.
craving for things that we already have, but we just want better and more.
craving for unnecessary things.
new phones, new shoes, new bags, new shirts, new gadgets... etc.

funny.
because in another part of the world, human beings just like us
are craving for simple things like food, water & shelter.
just those.

i`m not saying we should stop spending money.
i`m saying we should be grateful with what we already have.

not to mention to spare time with your love ones.
don`t keep on earning and live a pleasurable life.
if you think that money is life, then you may one day come to regret
what you would really lost from your heart.
it aint money. its love.

God, why the unfair world?
:(

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rainy day.

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just watched UP.
pretty touching story.
:)
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honest to God i'll break your heart, tear you to pieces & rip you apart.

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disturbing lyrics... haha!

"Skinned her alive, ripped her apart
Scattered her ashes, buried her heart"
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thats [30 Seconds to Mars`s Night of the Hunter Flood Remix]
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Search - Isabella

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Isabella.

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i was listening back to some malay rock songs.
the screams kinda get to me for SEARCH.

ahhhhh nice. shall have a good sleep. :)
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circles, really.

there are things in life you can`t pretend to not know .

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why did it ever happened?
now its getting back, stuck in my head.

i don`t want to play with the roots anymore.
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laughter is the best medicine.

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haha.. i`m still unwell
but,

thank you ! :)
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recovering .

fast fast. i dont have much time.

heavy head, burning throat

sick sick sick. wo bu xi huan. :(

:)

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movies spree.

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How To Train Your Dragon yesterday.

Valkyrie today.
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great movies. great time. watched online.
haha.
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still not yawning .

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been dead bored these days. been helping sis with her school project on Racial Harmony.
yeah i eventually got myself into the library to go and borrow books. that, is unlike me.
i don`t really read non-fiction books, whats more with history.
and i borrowed this book "Nadra Tragedy" and only read 2 pages so far since last 3-4 days?
whats more saddening is those 2 pages are just names of people that`ll be mentioned in the book.
=.="

its not hard to read a book for me. its just that the starting is always difficult but once indulged,
then there goes. i`ll read and read until finish.
still remember that time i read "Harry Potter & The Order of The Phoenix".
766 pages. done in 2 days. okay well... fiction mah. haha.
not to mention i was kinda Harry Potter fan. O.O
~

the weather has not been going easy on dear Earth. or maybe more specifically, Singapore.
those rainy days seems to be over. i miss them.
i remember that time it rained heavily. me & cousin ran out to bustop with our company's cardboard. =D rainy days no more. sad.
now sometimes i wont be wearing a shirt at home. freaaaaaaking waaarm!
LOL. now that i remember, the living room's wall fan kinda dismantled itself early morning.
best part, it was still spinning when it reverse engineered. haha.
i didnt bother checking out cos was dead tired.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yes, i miss school life.
humans can never be grateful with what they have.
see when we`re in school, we wanna get out. now that we`re out, we wanna go back in.
okay thats me. i know some would say the same, some won`t.
working life & school life. which is better?
i still prefer doing work WITH friends no matter how difficult. life`s just great that way. :)

a schoolmate ended her life last Wednesday. Melissa Toh. She`s everywhere on the net.
didnt really know her but she`s from TP design school hmm.
still young. so much life ahead of her. suicide should never be an option.
not to mention suicide is frowned upon by most religion. nevertheless, R.I.P.
hope you`ve found your safe haven. :)

look at that. its 3.27am. i`m supposed to be in bed. i was craving for it just now.
end up writing proper full sentences in my blog. how rare.
my national service letter has yet to come. & its just another waiting game.
we`ve got a problem here. my stomach`s asking for food. @.@
alright time to sleep. oh, i`m trying to grow a beard.
its not easy. pfft. off~
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been digging for remixes .

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