yin & yang.

it is always about being fair.
at least that what it means to me from when i was young.

growing up, i always make sure the people behind me don't get any lesser than what i got.
it can be from taking lesser food so that the rest can enjoy.
or taking the less pleasing item.
or walking the extra mile.
or waiting an extra hour.

in other words, i don't mind sacrificing so others can be happy.
i believe that it was fair in my eyes and it is normal for me.

then i got older and realise there can never be fairness in the world.
no one appreciates you when you do good.
but you will get the attention when you did something bad.

i always try to see the good in people no matter what the circumstances.
feeding myself with reasons that could have resulted in their actions.
there is always good in people.

then the girl i dearly love broke my trust.

i went psychotic.
everything that i had believed in just crumbled.
its as if i had lived in a fantasy where everyone could have a happy life all along.
and reality gave me a hard wake-up slap.

this is the cruel world we live in.
nothing is fair.